Some days I struggle just to be on the planet. Have you ever felt that way? It all gets so overwhelming, and I most definitely was raised to be a ‘good girl’ and never complain or feel dissatisfied. So much of what comes at us on social media is this positive message to stay light, with no time given to feel or experience the darkness we all encounter along the path. Don’t say what we feel about politics, or how the world is going for it might offend someone. It reminds me of the time when my late husband died and we found what a bloody mess he left with his estate and a dear friend counseled me that I should remain silent, after all everyone held him in the highest regard – no need to sully that story! Seriously, how can anyone tell someone else not to sit in their own darkness, or speak about it with others?! I often find in my grief work with other widows and widowers that is part of the journey, sharing your story so that they can see a light at the end of their own tunnel.
It takes courage to use one’s voice. This was the very premise I began this blog with many years ago now. I started writing and sharing my story so that others would know they were not alone in their darkness. Imagine my surprise then when I recently found that someone had taken my very words and used them as the backbone for a short snippet on giving advice, and that this person has a Ph.D in Psychology, or purports to at any rate. I mentioned it in a good-natured manner in my comments hoping that they would reach out and say, yes you inspired me and thank you. Nothing. After giving it pause, I have decided to not follow his blog any longer, for I am starting to notice a trend of this in his posts. What I wish if he reads this, is to please not take credit for others thoughts and writings. You know not how we arrived at our place in time, and some of us, like me, are not as highly credentialed as you, and just sharing our souls one word at a time in order to help the world find a crack where the light can begin to get in. By plagiarizing us, it doesn’t give you any higher standing, and in fact does not solidify you as a professional. It also stings. You could have taken my words and given me the credit and then added your own thoughts around it all. I have done this with many others in the past, and it is a BIG reminder to me to always be certain I do this especially with photographs that I might not have taken.
Being mindful is my lesson, and to always give credit where it is due. Mostly, to hold onto my voice and never allow people to run me over; I don’t have to be a ‘good girl’ and it is not being negative to speak of my shadows. Let go of fear, and rise.
F E A R has two meanings: ‘forget everything and run’ or ‘face everything and rise’ the choice is yours. – Zig Ziglar